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04-16-2012 #21Junior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
This is gonna sound crazy.
Even thinking about it makes me nervous. It's like I can see the pain and despair in their eyes. Just the thought that someone killed a helpless animal, and then ate it? Not okay. I'm not a vegetarian, but I don't want to see that happen to any animal. It gives me chillsI'll wander the streets, avoiding them eats,
'Till the ring on my finger slips to the ground.
A gift to the gutter, a gift to the city,
The veins of which, have broken me down.
I hate answering the phone & somebody ringing my doorbell.
Riding public transportation. I'm always terrified that somebody near me is going to vomit, and I won't be able to get out.
I'm the same with asking people for things like in shops I can't even order anything without my mouth going dry and wanting to run and hide. I usually get my cousin to do it, she doesn't mind, she thinks its because I'm shy, or one of my best friends, so I dont usually eat out or go out, I'd rather not have to face talking to people.
Making calls and taking calls. Answering the phone makes me anxious. Making phone calls makes me anxious. Unless its to my cousin. I guess she's sort of a safety blanket for me.
Bugs in my clothes. This one freaks me out because of all the freak accidents you hear.. TMI warning... A guy was licking an envelope cut his tongue and there was a cockroach egg on it and went inside the cut on his tongue and it grew inside and basically ew... So basically bug eggs hatching under my skin freaks me out. Things like worms you get, ew, ew, ew. That's why I'm cautious about what I eat and touch. Alot of this has to do with my phobia though, trypophobia, *shudders*
Being late. If I'm late to arrive anywhere I'd rather not go in, I would turn around and come home unfortunately I can't drive so whoever is with me makes me go in, and then people stare at me and it's like I'm a freak.
Using money, travel cards, tickets, basically having the necessary things prepared to go out. For example not having enough money to pay for something. My travel card not working. Stemming from this, forgetting something behind. It's like I can't function if I know theres something I've forgotten thats why I check I have everything thoroughly quite a few times.
I also get quite anxious when it's dark but again phobia of the dark... I feel like its closing in on me and suffocating me and I'm going to die.
I get anxious when I feel nauseated or someone else feels nauseous. LOL again emetophobia.
I guess I can't really separate my phobias and anxieties, they go hand in hand."Just how happy I am, in this moment right now, the way the light's hitting that face of yours, there's this little breeze coming in through the window, and it doesn't matter if I have ten thousand more moments like this, or just this one because it's all the same, yeah, just that, right now, this moment, I have this." - Anne Hathaway, Love And Other Drugs.
Oh thank goodness. That was the creepiest thing ever. Envelopes and cockroach eggs. Bad combination. LOL."Just how happy I am, in this moment right now, the way the light's hitting that face of yours, there's this little breeze coming in through the window, and it doesn't matter if I have ten thousand more moments like this, or just this one because it's all the same, yeah, just that, right now, this moment, I have this." - Anne Hathaway, Love And Other Drugs.
- Join Date
- Sep 2008
- in another dimension ;p
- Blog Entries
just waking up in the morning . . . *sigh*Lady Persephone
I can almost see him now before me. What would I say to him, if he were really here? Forgive me, Iíve never known this feeling. Iíve lived without it all my life. Is it any wonder then I fail to recognize you? You brought it to me for the first time. Is there anyway that I can tell you how my life has changed. Anyway at all, to let you know what sweetness you have given me. There is so much to say and I canít find the words except for these: I love you. - from Somewhere in Time
bathroom anxiety.......for sure
It really sucks. As soon as there is no bathroom around, I need to go. Urgently. My IBS started my panic attacks which then spread to all parts of my life. The IBS started because of my anorexia. Its been a downward spiral.
Anytime I feel there is something wrong with my body, I get panicy. Google doctor is not your friend. According to google, the symptoms I have had link me to about 20 different types of cancer. I have banned myself from asking google about even the smallest of symptoms.
Last edited by explicit-metal; 04-18-2012 at 10:25 PM."pain is an illusion" Ė parabola Tool
I often get anxious about going to sleep, especially when I know I have to be up early. I hate lying in bed and not being able to sleep; I find myself dwelling on a myriad of things that just make my anxiety worse.
I get general anxiety about what i'm doing with my life, about getting older and seemingly getting nowhere. I worry about holding onto a job, or trying to find a new job. Money is another concern... I never seem to have much of it! This stresses me out because I would really like to live somewhere else but I can't afford it. I also worry that I haven't seen enough of the world - i'd like to travel more... however, flights scare me (only been on a plane twice).
People make me anxious. I struggle with social anxiety, although I am better than I used to be. It flares up badly at times though, then I feel like I slip into hermit mode and don't want to be around anyone... kind of a problem when I have to go into work regardless.
In general, all sorts of things make me anxious. Anxiety is a big problem for me, always has been. Definitely a big factor in my ED.ďDoctor, you don't know what it is to doubt everything, even yourself. No, you don't; you couldn't with eyebrows like yours.Ē
― Bram Stoker, Dracula
-Food (isn't that why we're all here?)
-TESTS especially open-book.
-Writing with anything else but a pen.
-When I just have that "feeling" that someone else is on edge--it freaks me out into panic mode.
-The bass of music. This is a really bad one for me. I have panic attacks on the spot. Crying, screaming, heart pounding, on the floor, hyperventilating, etc.
-When I see someone thin or talking about loosing weight or weight in general.
-When people eat my "safe foods" or when I'm out. This one's really bad too because we never go grocery shopping and I only allow myself a couple things that are okay.
-When I'm out of Diet Coke. I don't even care always if I'm drinking it, I just need to know it's there.
-My mum coming home.
-If someone confronts me about something, no matter how small, stupid, or if they were joking.
-Rejection. I mentally don't know how to cope with it, so I don't ask questions that I don't know the answer to.
-Germs. Typical OCD.
-When things happen too fast.
05-01-2012 #30Junior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
- the south of the north.
being responsible for my own life
eating in front of people
meeting new people
letting people down