I Think I'm OK (copy and paste from my WE blog)

[The Bright Side]

I haven't felt like this in a very very long time. I was sad the other day not in the depths of despair as Anne of Green Gables would say lol but just meh. You know?

But now...two days in a row I feel completely rested. I kind of feel like this is the way I'm supposed to feel. And I don't know what I'm doing differently except for eating more regularly. i still want to binge on a regular basis though but the ability to do so is really limited now and I can't have what I want so it's not as likely to happen anymore...the urge is there and that still concerns me though.

I still have the urges to either binge or starve when things are not going well, or if hubbie says or does something that bothers me. And the past couple of days I have had some starving periods because I'm just not in the habit of preparing lunches etc. When I do eat (and it's usually happening at breakfast and dinner) there's actual nutrient rich food. Not all of it but some.

I've been exhausted at night and I'm keeping up somewhat with work and cleaning the house. So I have been going to bed at either 9 (last night) or 10 (the night before). Yesterday I woke up feeling very rested, still groggy but rested. Woke up at my usual 6 AM (it's either 5 or 6 depending on what day of the week it is and/or what needs to be done).

Today I woke up rested again, without my 6 AM alarm, in fact I woke up willingly at 4:50 not really wanting to go back to sleep. It felt awesome.

What is going on with me? What does my near future hold? Am I actually going to start being productive?

It's 7 AM and I've already cleaned up the basement for my clients and I'm about to go and shovel snow so no one slips coming to lessons.

**added only here** My cheeks are puffy and I don't like that...

God this feels kinda good. Is this happy? Or is this just normal...or ... what?? Whatever it is, I'm enjoying it a little bit.

[LRT]

Hey hun,

I'm feeling that same as you, since eating more regular, yes I still have days where I feel the urge to binge and purge, not as strong as it used to be. I still have the urge not to eat when things aren't going to plan or my head is screaming at me.

I'm putting this feeling down to being normal.

Keep up the good work xxx