Small triumphs!

[StudyingALot]

Recovery is fucking hard so I feel like we should celebrate the little tiny daily triumphs that mean so much to us.

For example, my day was a great one for recovery!

This morning, I had a breakfast of more than 100 calories for the first time in probably 12 or 15 months. And the first breakfast with three food groups represented (including protein!! and carbs!!) in probably three years.

I just ate for desert a small bowl of coconut-based chocolate ice cream, which may be vegan, high-fiber, and all-natural, but is still ice cream! And my parents, for the first time since I started eating ice cream, weren't breathing down my neck about it. In fact, they've already gone to bed, and I still ate it!

I'm the only one up in my house now (it's around midnight) and yet I'm stationary, on the computer. Not working out. I can't remember the last time this happened.

CELEBRATE.

[stories]

Congrats on all of that.

This past week has been full of ups and downs, but... I actually ate caesar salad (without the cheese/croutons) and got through most of it. I didn't eat it much of last summer and when my eating disorder began I became scared of it. What is weird is a lot of the spring of last year, that, and steamed veggies were my dinner, which my brother described at "rabbit food". So I wasn't eating much anyway, but did not have an eating disorder back then.

The first time I tried it this week, I held the first bite in my hand (which did have cheese and croutons on it) and I was almost shaking. I just held it there for a few minutes. For a medium sized salad I only got through the first two initial bites. Then the second time I tried I got through a good amount of it.

I am working my way up.

My next goal, probably to drink apple juice again.

EDIT: I ate dinner with my brother and one of his ex-girlfriend's (they are still friends) and it wasn't too weird. My anxiety did not go up as much as I thought it would.

[LRT]

This is fab well done xx

yes recovery is bloody hard, the hardest thing I have ever done but with the help & support we will get there. x