Ok so...wtf

[The Bright Side]

for those of you who don't know I suffer from depression to the point of using starvation for so many things...punishment, coping, feeling stronger, feeling like I'm in charge of all situations etc. Then come the binge stages as would be expected.

So now I'm being forced to recover and all i can do is eat eat eat. Even if it's healthy food, I have to eat as much as I can and then i'm in pain but looking for more food. Hubbie even commented once where I said I was fucking full. Within 5 minutes I was jamming a granola bar in my mouth as fast as I could and thinking about what else we had that would satisfy me.

Anyway, how long can this last for? I mean fuck, I can't carry on like this? I was maintaining my weight and now it's starting to slowly climb again. And I'm always soooooooooooooooo full now like all the time. I liked the emptiness when I was controlling it.

Will this stop if I keep at this?

[Bathory]

Is the healthy food you mention whole and unprocessed foods? Or the typical processed "health food" like bars, etc?

[The Bright Side]

none of that health food shit. no money for that that's for sure. protein and veggies is the main thing. sometimes there's a starch with it.

I just want to get as full as I can and not stop after that. That's another reason why I normally fast. it's either eat nothing or eat everything.

[Bathory]

Maybe you're not eating frequently enough. Eating every 3-4 hours can help reduce the urge to binge later on, especially if the the snacks are protein of some sort, like 100g of low fat cottage cheese or 30g of raw and unsalted nuts, for example.

When I started eating more frequently and ditched refined sugar completely out of my diet I was able to successfully stop binging

[The Bright Side]

*sigh*

Ok, more planning is needed then. I'll have to force myself to have snacks even with my schedule. I guess it's rocket science eh?

Thanks Bathory.

[Bathory]

Yep and honestly, it really does help. I thought my binging was never going to subside, but luckily it has. You just gotta keep your blood sugar up and that's what snacking on healthy protein foods helps with, otherwise it's easy to feel ravenous if your blood sugar drops.

Good luck! And you're welcome