I don't want him to worry

[jdub]

So my ex and I are really close. We were together for 4 years before we decided to take a break while he goes to grad school out of the country. When he was considering going to the school, we talked about the distance and how it would affect our relationship. One major concern for him was that I would start throwing up again. I was bulimic for 2 years before we started dating, and he was the reason I stopped. He knows this. He was hesitant to go to the school, even though it was his dream school, because he was worried that I would fall back into my bulimic habits. I told him, no, I would not. I said bulimia is disgusting and doesn't work, and that I wasn't going to go back.

Well I lied. It worked for a while, until I gained a ton of weight. I started throwing up again about 6 months ago. But I want to stop.

I am wondering if I should tell him that I have started again. I feel like it would help a TON with my attempts at quitting, he could hold me accountable, and I would feel like I am letting someone else down (besides myself) when I do it. But I also don't want him to worry, he is in a tough program and doesn't need more things to be concerned about. Plus I'm not the type that wants anyone to worry about me. Although he probably suspects it, he knows that I have gained weight and that I'm having a hard time losing it. He also knows that I have been really depressed lately. When we dated, I threw up a handful of times, and he could always kinda tell just by talking to me.

So we skype about every 2 weeks, and I don't know if I should tell him or not?

[KoH.]

if you can, i say go for it. be honest with him

[Mr.Mirror]

Sorry, I just can't see how telling him can do any good.

Maybe it would be better if instead of telling him about it you try to work on getting some form of help to recover.
Then some time from now you could tell him "I relapsed, but I'm well now" or at least, if you can't hold it that long and end up talking about it while you're working to get off of purging, you'd say "I've relapsed but I'm being helped and getting better".

That would prob make him worry way less and put a lot less weight on the relationship you have with him now