Paranioa and Anxiety. And does it come along with your ED?

[LeannaMae]

So a little bit before I developed my ED I was really anxious in crowds and would often feel "lonely" (not exactly the right word to describe it but close enough) inside of crowds.
But ever since I got my ED, I have been having HORRIBLE anxiety attacks during lunch with friends, before church with friends, being around immature/loud people, and just everything and anything that would make peoples' nerves go off.
Like last night my friends were sitting on this boys lap talking about their weight (98 pounds) and I got so depressed and anxious and wanted to JUST BE ALONE. My mom teased me about being a loner but that didn't make me as upset, I guess. I just felt really out of control and I just started HATING MYSELF.
And today at lunch people were goofing off and making "perverted jokes" and I almost started crying and I wanted to get up and leave but I didn't want people talking about me behind my back if I did that for leaving by myself.

Also, I've been really paranoid. I'll sit and watch the window if it is open and make sure no one watches inside for like 10 minutes straight. I'm really paranoid about window watchers and when I'm in the shower, even though I know nothing is out there I get sooo scared and have to look out of the shower multiple times to JUST MAKE SURE.

I don't know. I just mostly want the anxiety to go away if nothing else.

[FreshBeginnings]

I've always been an anxious person.. I think since my eating disorder developed, it's gotten worse, cause I experience a lot of what you're describing. I've always been the kind of person to have one or two close friends, and be perfectly fine with that.. because I absolutely hate large crowds. It's like a sensory overload being in public or around a large group of people. Plus, I've always had those paranoid thoughts about what people think of me, or if people are mad at me for no apparent reason, or if people think negatively in general.. so I just avoid people to avoid those paranoid thoughts, I guess. Ha. And I hate hate hate walking away or walking past people, because I always think they're either thinking or talking about me in a negative way. Oh yeah, and I know what you mean what you say you feel alone in a crowd of people. I can definitely connect to that. It's like I'm stuck in my own head all the time, and no one understands; and I hate how that kinda sounds like I'm just being an angsty teen SIGH! I know this probably didn't help, but just know you're not alone in your anxieties or paranoia.

[silver_elf]

Me too...
I get panic attacks in crowds. Hate them. Hate cities. and yeah I am so paranoid about people talking about me when I'm not there or being mad at me, and I hate walking near people on sidewalks.
I am also a very very anxious person.

[penggwin]

all the females in my family suffer from anxiety, i have these panic pills as i'll just randomly get an attack.
i get very anxious when i go out shopping and i pass anywhere that has food (mainly because i'll look at it and have an argument with myself), i also get anxious when i go food shopping with mama. my anxiety definitely makes my disorder worse because i'm so paranoid about weight gain, people saying something about why i don't eat much.. and when people invite me out to eat.. BIG NO NO.

[London]

i've had anxiety ever since i was little, so i understand where you're coming from. i actually got diagnosed with paranoid personality disorder, where i constantly think everyone is out to get me or lie to me. when i found out i was actually a little relieved that the feelings i had actually had a name.
i hope your anxiety and paranoia get better, and that you have a good rest of the week xx

[shannonichigo]

Yesyesyesyesyes.

[vaendin]

I just wanted to post and say that I can really relate to what you said. Especially when you just want to be alone when there are things around you that trigger your nerves. Sometimes I just want to curl up in a dark room with my ipod for a few days...