OCD At A Peak (tw? Maybe?)

[almost_ashlee]

Today was the worst day ever.
My alarm clock didn't go off. I don't know anyone else who has morning rituals, but I do, and when I miss them for some reason, my entire day is bound to be off. Because I got up late, I ended up shoving pretzel's into my gob. Then, when I realized what I'd done, I threw them up in the bushes. Right in front of my busmates.
I couldn't take a shower, so I smelled something funky all day long, and everyone else probably smelled it too. I couldn't brush my teeth, and with the vomit-taste I've probably been breathing dragon-breath all day long. To top the morning off, I forgot all of my homework.
When my mornings go wrong, my OCD jump starts and starts attacking my brain like a woodpecker on steroids. In first period, I took out my ruler and started measuring the distance between my pencils so they would be exactly even. In Art class(why the hell did I choose this class? What was I thinking??) I freaked out looking at my friends colored pencils, then asked her if I could reorganize them. She had a 48 pack, and kept messing them up. Because she. Thought. It. Was. Funny. Then the rest of our tablemates started laughing at me because I had to order them in a precise way.
In history, I bit a boys head off for poking me in my arm, told him that any part of him that touched me he wouldn't be getting back. And then I stood up too fast and fell when my vision went black. Luckily only a few people saw me, but it was still horrifying. Then I failed my French exam, and can't retake it because I don't have all my hw turned in. Wanna guess why I failed it? Because it was about times, and the clocks were so funky looking that I was too distracted trying to mentally fix them to pay attention to the test questions.
So, all in the course of one day, I've gotten myself laughed at, arranged a 48 pack of colored pencils, freaked out at a boy, failed an exam, and almost passed out.
Sorry. I think I'm ranting.
Anyway's, care to share any of your horrifying OCD experiences? And meanwhile, please reassure me that I've not made a total idiot of myself?

[allthosevoices]

Firstly, you ARE NOT AN IDIOT.

OCD is so time consuming, and can completely control your life.

I do the same thing with pencils, in terms of arranging them. If they aren't in rainbow order, I completely spaz out and my heart starts pumping a thousand miles an hour. I get a huge anxiety attack, and everyone else is just like..WTF

When my alarm doesn't go off, or it isn't set for 5 past the hour, my whole day ends up being total shit. I think to myself, what is the point, like really, what is the point in getting up now.

My most shocking OCD experience, was a time when I had to wear the same pair of pyjamas to bed every single night. they would get washed in the day, and then I'd bring them in off of the line and wear them to bed. I'd then have to watch the movie 'Aquamarine' in full before I could sleep.

So incredibly stupid/weird/annoying.

So you are not an idiot! Haha. OCD is a strange condition

♥

[insight]

You're not an idiot. OCD is a complex condition, and it's not your fault you have it!

And I know how annoying it is when pencils are "out of order," I always rearrange them. Same with my pencil case...though I'm not sure why, I mean, they get messed up when they go back in the case? Idk.

I don't really have any shocking experiences, but I have gone mental at people because they've made repetitive noises that have driven me nuts.

[moon_light]

You're not an idiot! OCD isn't your fault. It can be horridly embarrassing, but try not to blame yourself. It's hard for others to understand.

I TOTALLY know what you mean about the morning rituals. I have a certain way I have to get up, and if someone else wakes me up the wrong way I freak out and the rest of the day is just ruined.

I have night rituals, too. I have to do certain things before bed. They can take up to two hours. It really takes away from my sleep And I'm a person who needs a lot of sleep.

I'd say my most embarrassing thing... well, I used to have this really weird thing about time. If you said you were going to be here in five minutes, you had to be here in five minutes. Period. Not before, not after. And if it wasn't exactly five minutes, I would have a complete breakdown. My entire life would fall apart. So, for instance, once my mom said it would take her ten minutes in the grocery store to pick up something. At 11 minutes I was holding back tears. By 13 minutes I was having a full on panic attack in the middle of the grocery store. My mom thought I was being a brat. The entire situation was so frustrating. Everyone in the store thought I was insane, my mom thought I was a spoiled rotten teenager, and my entire life was now pointless and chaotic. Best 13 minutes of my life.

[allthosevoices]

So, for instance, once my mom said it would take her ten minutes in the grocery store to pick up something. At 11 minutes I was holding back tears. By 13 minutes I was having a full on panic attack in the middle of the grocery store.

^^^^ THIS

OMG I went to the cash point, and my Mum went to the cash point literally 10 meters away. She told me she would be about 4 minutes. Once I'd finished, I looked over at the cashpoint she was at..but she was gone.

I full on freaked out for 10 minutes, thinking that someone had kidnapped my Mum. I took out my phone and started dialing panic numbers. By the time my heart almost pounded out of my chest, she comes wandering round the corner, claiming she had to pop into the shop for something.

I was left standing there like a complete lemon, having the worst panic attack, and she just didn't understand that if she was going to go into the shop, at least notify me! Or wait for me to take my cash out, and then co e meet you at the cash point.

Gahh.

If someone says they are going to be somewhere, then they need to be there. If they disappear, I have the worst meltdown.