pureza

This is the year i'll finish my A-levels and i'll be attenting university in october.
i'm scared to the bones. All control has been gone for the last few weeks, but right now i need it, i need it to be with me for the next 5 months so badly.
i was above 65kg again and i can't stand to look at my body and even worse i have a boyfriend now and i just feel ashamed when he sees me and all that fat.
i got me a new jeans a few days ago and it is size 30, it fits, but i'm only going to wear them again when i'm under 63kg. Maybe when i'm 60kg - depends on how fast the loss goes.
School starts again tomorrow and i don't know how to do it, i just don't know. It feels like i used up all energy for the time before christmas break and like there is nothing left.