Who is this Ana anyways?
by, 08-31-2011 at 08:13 AM (305 Views)
Everybody is talking about an Ana, who has too much control over their lives. Others say food has control over them. I donít get it.
I tend to keep people away from me and like to distance the ones who have to be close to me. I canít even imagine making an illness a person. That would just make me panic. And Iím not anorexic so why even call it Ana? Yes, my ED helps me cope, but itís not my friend, itís my tool.
And I canít see how food can be in control over anybody. The food is just a thing we humans can eat, process and get nutrients from and all this only to survive. Itís not the food that is the enemy. The food doesnít care if you eat it or not. It does not exist to _make_ you eat it. The real enemy is your own body and its instinct to survive. It needs the food to survive and that is why you have cravings.
My body is a slave and I am its mistress. I am the only one who can control my own body. No bitch named Ana or Mia or whoever is in control over me or my body. If my body rebels itís my responsibility to get the control back. Itís only me and my body and I rule with an iron fist. Whenever Iím weak, my body tends to rebel and I need to stay strong to keep everything under control.
I guess Iím sick, but itís just a part of me. I need to be perfect regardless of an ED. My illness is my tool to survive and itís killing me little by little every day, but at least I am in control.
If I can't be perfect nor be in control, I donít want to be at all!