Hey Guys!

[thin_not92]

How is everyone doing today? I hope well. I'd really like to hear how your days have gone.

Anyway, Do you guys ever feel alone? Like outside of the internet? Like say at home, school, etc? I do. I feel like I can't talk to anybody or trust anybody outside of this website. I need to talk to people who understand what is going on with my life right now outside of the internet. Well I don't know what I'm saying. So never mind. forget it.

Sorry EVERYONE
Thanks for listening to me ramble on about nothing.

[sarah-charlotte]

hi sweety, don't worry we all feel alone most of the time, and everyone rambles on about nothing once in a while. just remember you are not alone even if friends and family don't get it or don't care, your never alone with ana and u will always have us to support u xxxxxxx

[silverheart92]

hey :)

schools a total bore, i feel as though every1 judges you it annoyded the crap out of me today, i was in a bad mood 2 begin with :(.

so that was my day

i feel the exact same way i feel as though even though i don't know you you guys are like the best friends i have as youdon't judge which is excellent anyway yeah

better go , wow i feel so much better now that i got that off my chest.

thanks

[Lalianie]

ugh gosh.. i feel alone all the time ]=
i get this weird feeling in my chest because i feel like if i tell anyone.. anything
they'd be disappointed in me or something ._.
its.. really..
horrible ]=

[pinkprincessbelle]

I know how u feel. It's like u want someone to know cause it hurts so much like it's doing your head in so much that you feel like it's going to explode! But then you realise that it's just you and ana and no one else (except u guys on this site....lol).

[Professorana]

unfortunatly ana is a very isolated life. I'm married with a child (I know I'm awful to be doing this to myself but at least I didn't restrict or purge during the pregnancy). We trade up our social lives for ana in the end and it's not something to talk about since nobody understands it anyway. It's not just about being thin--why don't people get that?

I have a rubber band on my rist that I snap every time I feel hungry. I tell myself something like "hunger=control" and I don't feel as hungry. It's really helping to retrain my brain.

Hope you're feeling ok, I know how much this sucks and how lonely this is but you have us.

[pinkprincessbelle]

I like that rubber band trick! I'm going to try that!:)

[pinkprincessbelle]

Thanx Professorana. It's good to feel like I belong somewhere!:)

[ella_bella]

Hi ladies,

Yeah I like the rubber band trick too. I'm fasting at the moment so i might try it. Do you have to like train yourself or something?

It's sad that you kinda have to be alone with this thing unless you know someone else outside the internet going through the same thing. But you'll get through. Just take each day as it comes. xx message me if you want to talk xx

[pinkprincessbelle]

Thanx will do!:)

[Ram90011]

Hey everyone.. I'm just joined when I saw this forum.

Lately I've been feeling I need to talk to other people who feel the same way I do. I've been more depressed than usual. I pay a lot more attention to my weight, it's now an all the time obsession. I'm eating probably about 800 calories or less during the day and wish I could eat less. The other day I completely broke down in front of my friends and told them how I felt. But they don't get it. They don't see what I see.. no one does. Last night I was over my friends house and I was starving. We went running and I ran 10 laps on two 100 calorie packs that I had 3 hrs before. They kept talking about how I need to eat and that I'm crazy for thinking I look disgusting. Then, about 5 mins. later I left. My friend was cooking something to eat and I couldn't be around her at that point. But then I came home and ate some cheese and ham! It's like I just can't get away from it. I hate who I am and what my life consists of. No one understands.. When I try to explain, they make it seem like it's pointless for me to feel this way... but whether it's pointless or not.. I still feel this way!

I know this is really long and so pointless, but I just needed to get some frustration out. By the way, I think I'm gonna try that rubberband trick! It might work for me.

[Professorana]

I don't know why the rubberband works but it's got something to do with cognitive therapy--shrinks use it but you're supposed to tell yourself whatever the opposite of your negative feelings are. So when I'm hungry I snap it a few times and tell myself hunger=power, hunger=control=hunger=thin. It really does help for some reason. I'm eating like almost no calories right now. I went to the gym this morning to do weight training and I HAD to eat otherwise I would have blacked out. I ate half a raw nutrition bar which was 96 cals but then I felt like a hog. If I black out in the gym though, my trainer will stop training me and I can't have that happen.

[Professorana]

I don't know why the rubberband works but it's got something to do with cognitive therapy--shrinks use it but you're supposed to tell yourself whatever the opposite of your negative feelings are. So when I'm hungry I snap it a few times and tell myself hunger=power, hunger=control=hunger=thin. It really does help for some reason. I'm eating like almost no calories right now. I went to the gym this morning to do weight training and I HAD to eat otherwise I would have blacked out. I ate half a raw nutrition bar which was 96 cals but then I felt like a hog. If I black out in the gym though, my trainer will stop training me and I can't have that happen

[Ram90011]

I just want to say thanks for the rubberband trick! I started today and it's already helping!

[Professorana]

It's so wierd but it really does! I'm fasting and I keep snaping it and it totally refocuses me away from hunger. Glad you're doing ok today:)

[Lalianie]

oh wow o.o
i guess i'll try the rubberband trick aswell.
I did this thing where i'd pinch myself if i was ever hungry,
and i suppose it worked
because i'd pinch myself till it went numb and i didnt feel it anymore >.>
lol.
never thought of the rubberband thing..
thanks for sharing it! :D

[pinkprincessbelle]

Ram90011 I totally understand! I had a major meltdown on Friday night (Ihad been drinking)! I told my flatmates and the guy I was sort of seeing. Don't think they took me too seriously though thank god! Got rid off the guy by ranting about wanting to kill myself! Don't need a man when I'm consumed with my ED. Need all the energy to focus on that!:(

[Professorana]

Men are seriously in the way when it comes to ana. I told my husband to leave me alone or I was out of there and he's being really good now and not making me eat.

[pinkprincessbelle]

yay good 2 know he knows not to hassle u. I just had 2 eat cause my flattie was worried. cant deal with those ay puppy dog eyes ! Help me feel fat told him he fucked up my fast!!!!!:(

[sarah-charlotte]

my ex was sooooooo furious with my lying to him about ana, we had some pretty heated arguments about it which at the time really upset me. I was being forced to chose between the two and it brought out the worst in me - i got very angry and protective of ana and was not gona stand him slagging it off. I couldn't stand being made to feel guilty for something that comes naturally for me, something that feels so right.
strange thing is we are now friends, we like each other still and without him worrying about me or me getting pissed off at him for making me eat we actually get along great now. He is very anti-pro ana and I'm the exact opposite but we have somehow moved passed that. its soooo strange.
i mean its sad that we had to break up but ana comes first and he just has to deal with that.
:)

[pinkprincessbelle]

Ana always comes first!!!!!!!:D:o

[Ram90011]

Thanks for the support. I've had a better week, except my friends. My best friend who I love dearly is against ana and hates it. She doesn't understand, of course. Her boyfriend, who I pretty much spilt my guts to just knows. He slips in these statements every now and then, but I'm past it. I really feel like they don't matter and can't persuade me to eat.. I actually think I'll have better control around them than when I'm by myself sitting at home.

[pinkprincessbelle]

My work friends have noticed! AARGGGGHHH! One said to me 2day......."do you want a cupcake Belle?" "No thanks" "Gosh I haven't seen you eat since like.....July!" Oh no!:eek:

[Professorana]

My boss at work is always ending his directions to me with the prase, "oh, and eat something!" What a tool. As if he has the right. The fun part about being an adult is nobody can MAKE you do anything anymore, including go back to recovery or sit down to dinner. I've decided for the holidays I'm just bringing my raw veggies and steamed kale or cabbage and telling them I'm back on my strickt vegan diet. If they don't like it they can eat my shorts!

[sarah-charlotte]

wish i could do that, im an au pair and live with my employers, they buy my food and the only way i can hide this from them is to "eat" alone in my room and just throw away the food when they are not looking - thank god for garbage disposals! on the bright side, the husband is a fashion photographer so he is around anorexics all day anyway!
:)

[pinkprincessbelle]

Sad 4 u sarah-charlotte but I can understand where he comes from. One of my flatmates said 'It's ok just don't do it!" Ha! I suppose you have 2 remember hes only 22!:p