advice please?

[anonomousmia]

I was in love with my bf. . .not teenage 'love' but real love. I'm 21 so have had my share of relationships and he was the first ever bf I knew I loved. I thought we'd be together a long time. It was instant attraction, and it progressed so quickly.

He was the perfect bf, so understanding, supportive, great personality, i loved his mannerisms, his little voices, his scruffy hair, god i could go on all day but im sounding pathetic.

anyway he broke up with me, because i wouldn't open up to him enough and wouldn't help myself so he couldn't help me. this was, hmmm, 5/6 weeks ago now and im still hurting.

i get sad thinking about him, i cry talking to him - just a text or facebook sets me off. I cant help but look at his profile on fb to and get upset. I've seen him once since the break up and cried my eyes out and can't bare to see him again.

but i miss him so much. so so much. im lying here crying my eyes out. i dont give a shit about my ED atm, i just want him back. but there's no chance of that and i dont know what i can do to move on?

I've never had this happen to me before. Never loved someone so much to have it end so soon. Never been so attached to some1 to have it end when i didn't want it to. What can I do?xx

[mooncat]

I was in love with my bf. . .not teenage 'love' but real love. I'm 21 so have had my share of relationships and he was the first ever bf I knew I loved. I thought we'd be together a long time. It was instant attraction, and it progressed so quickly.

He was the perfect bf, so understanding, supportive, great personality, i loved his mannerisms, his little voices, his scruffy hair, god i could go on all day but im sounding pathetic.

anyway he broke up with me, because i wouldn't open up to him enough and wouldn't help myself so he couldn't help me. this was, hmmm, 5/6 weeks ago now and im still hurting.

i get sad thinking about him, i cry talking to him - just a text or facebook sets me off. I cant help but look at his profile on fb to and get upset. I've seen him once since the break up and cried my eyes out and can't bare to see him again.

but i miss him so much. so so much. im lying here crying my eyes out. i dont give a shit about my ED atm, i just want him back. but there's no chance of that and i dont know what i can do to move on?

I've never had this happen to me before. Never loved someone so much to have it end so soon. Never been so attached to some1 to have it end when i didn't want it to. What can I do?xx

i'm really sorry to hear about your break up. being a male that's been in a relationship with a girl with an ed, and know the frustrations of feeling helpless.

unfortunately my relationship didn't work out, because i tried to be too involved. i felt at the time that there *must* be something i can do to help, or that the ed *must* be something i caused.

perhaps this is the point your ex bf is at?

it was only much later that i understood how much of a personal thing this is, and that there was nothing i could do to change the situation. any partner can only be there to offer support, understanding and most importantly space when required.

if you want him back, then i don't think you've got much to lose. talking can work wonders - but remember he'll be hurting too.

first true love is always the worst when it ends, but i can assure you that it won't be your last love. time does heal all.

as you get older (take it from someone who's 30 :)) that each relationship gets better because you learn and grow from the last relationship.

all the best
andy

[anonomousmia]

Thank you so much for your reply. Yeah I realise I'm still young in the grand scheme of things, but I feel like it was totally new and different with him. Sorry to hear about your relationship to. I will try and talk to him I guess, but I know he doesn't want it. People give you different advice, so it's difficult to know whats the right things to do. Cheers, xx

[mooncat]

Thank you so much for your reply. Yeah I realise I'm still young in the grand scheme of things, but I feel like it was totally new and different with him. Sorry to hear about your relationship to. I will try and talk to him I guess, but I know he doesn't want it. People give you different advice, so it's difficult to know whats the right things to do. Cheers, xx

go with your gut instinct.

someone said to me once, better to regret something you have done rather than regret something you didn't :)

speak to your ex if you really want him back. you've got nothing to lose