I cut for the first time last night...

[thinspiration]

I have tried in the past to do it, i like the feel of the knife on my skin. I'm not sure what to do now? I don't think i want to do it, but i think of being alone and in the darkness of the night... it just seems so thrilling, i like how it felt. But i hear about people who cut and how its addicting, or how they actually end up killing or seriously hurting themselves. I don't want to do that to myself, and when i woke up it was just an ugly yet beautiful scar. Life's just bad right now, everything is down. My best friend hooked up with my boyfriend.. & my other best friend killed herself not to long ago.. My grandma has cancer, my moms starting to notice my ED. Everything's just out of whack. I feel helpless and alone.. cutting was like my escape. But not thinking about it... i don't think it would actually help me in long run. It may make me feel good, forget about things, make things easier to handle for a while. But i don't need any more problems, i think i want to do it again... But i really don't think its right. I'm just so lost, i need help. :( I'm only 14, and i just can't cope. How else do i deal with everything?...

[coco.]

i first started cutting a few months ago and trust me addictive isnt even the word. you start to become reliant on it to control your emotions. and very difficult to stop once you have began. please dont start it wont make you feel better. and will only get worse. if you ever need a chat pm me xx

[Maxhatter]

I totally agree with coco...I've been self harming for the past eight years... Today I cut myself worse than I ever have before, the first one I did today was the worst and even though it scared me a little I still had to do more. That's what happens. I have to do it because it's the only thing that stop the crap in my head.
There are consequences for everything. You're 14 yeah, so I take it you're in school? It is NOT a good idea to do it anyways, but in school is even worse. Your peers will not understand what it means and they will take the piss out of you, I learned that the hard way. And if you ever want tattoos, it messes that up too. Most tattooists won't tattoo over scars.

You've already sussed it kiddo...getting into SI is just giving you another problem. It's a quick thrill but just remember that you'll have to wake up with the scars.

You ever need to talk, pm!!

[moon_light]

Cutting is one of the worst habits you can ever get into. I've been doing it on and off for almost 7 years, and I'm only 18. Once you start, it becomes the only way you can deal with things. At first, it truly does help and it doesn't seem like that big of a deal. But after a while you NEED it. Nothing else will help but that, and it fucks up your life. You have to wear different clothes, are always self conscious, sometimes get infections if you don't sterilize, and you lose self control. You could seriously injure yourself. If you have a choice, please do not cut. It isn't something you want to get into.

If you ever need to talk send me a message (:

[Justagurl]

Hi...

Everyone has pretty much summed it up beautifully. Cutting is ughhh....I can't even decribe the effects this behavior has had on my life. I have been struggling with this ADDICTIVE behavior for the past 11 years (29 years old). Its like once you begin....quitting just seems like an unreachable task. If you ever want to talk, feel free to pm me.....

[UsedRomance]

i first started cutting a few months ago and trust me addictive isnt even the word. you start to become reliant on it to control your emotions. and very difficult to stop once you have began. please dont start it wont make you feel better. and will only get worse. if you ever need a chat pm me xx

Completely agree.

I'll have been cutting for 6 years this June. I never thought I would still be doing it even after 6 months- I have diary entries from December 05 which discuss how shocked I am that I was still doing it. I thought it would be a temporary thing.

Unfortunately, I think once you start the habit, it becomes your go-to solution. I sometimes go months without cutting, but then something can go wrong and I just feel like I need to do it again.