In-Patient Program Call

[JSMarcus]

Well today I did it. After spending the weekend with my boyfriend...he talked to me one more time. It was a good talk.

I talked to my doctor. She made the call to the in-patient hospital program. The hospital is checking with my insurance company now. I am waiting for a call back. If everything checks out I could be starting as soon as next week.

Right now I am going to be honest with you all. I am doing this half for others in my life. I am doing this for me, but I am doing this for others.

You guys asked once. Who is going to really do treatment? Well...I just raised my hand. It's shaking but I am going. Wish me luck.

[perfect_disguise]

wow, it takes amazing courage to do that. i am so happy for you to be able to take the steps into recovery. and i definitely know what you mean by you're doing it half for you, and half for others in your life. i think that's something that a lot of us struggle with, is caring more for others than we do for ourselves. but i hope that as you continue on your road to recovery you start to really care about your own well being as much as the others in your life do. it's awesome that you have people in your life who want to help you, even if you may not want to help yourself. they can see things in the objective light which is very helpful.
i am so proud of you for raising your shaking hand! it's so scary, but i wish you the best of luck :)

[JEANNE]

WOW, bravo JS! I will write more when I get home, my knees are just shaking in amazement and hope for you. OH MY. I have alot to say, to relate to you I think this is so great, you have my 10000000000% support and hopes and prayers and good wishes. Wonderful for you.

And you know what, no matter what the initial motivation to get you in the doors, you will eventually come to do this for yourself. And that is just fine, just fine. You are amazing and brave and courgeous. all my support goes with you! xxxooo love, Jeanne

[Felicia320]

That is so incredible. I am so proud of you.I know you can do this!

[elyse]

I'm so proud of your courage! I don't really know what to say, just that I think it's so great and I'm so happy for you! And I'm happy that you have someone in your life who is so supportive and who wants to help. All my best!

[Marialise]

Wow, JS! I am so, so, SOO proud of you right now! It takes so much courage to take that first step... I know that you are so incredibly nervous but this WILL be good! You are SUCH a strong, awesome person that I KNOW you will take this opportunity... Seize it... and freaking rock it out... Be the strongest one there :)

You're always so amazingly honest and I think that admitting that maybe you're doing this half for them is ok... Hell, it sure as anything beats not giving it a try at all! And you have so many wonderful things to live for :)

Eek... I'm a little scared with you (haha WITH you... not FOR you bc I KNOW you'll work it out... YOU WILL!!) but I'm ever so much more proud, excited, and hopeful for you...

Congrats, JS!! This is going to be hard work but I just KNOW you'll make the best of it!! Thanks for bringing some hope to me today :)

Love ya so... Let me know what/ when you need it and I'll be there!! <<3333 X's and O's- Mar

[JSMarcus]

Thanks guys,
I am still waiting on the insurance company and the hospital to get their act together but I called my HR department and I have my short term disability and leave of absence paper work started. My job is being held for me for up to 3 months and my pay check is being payed up to 75% while I am out of the office.

I am on my way as soon as I get the green light from Blue Cross Blue Shield.

[ScienceOfBallet]

I'm so happy for you! I'm so glad you took this step in your life. You can do this :) That is so awesome also that you'll be getting paid, even partially, while you are out.. and having your job held for up to 3 months.. This all sounds like it is falling into place so well for you!! YAY.
I'm not going to lie, I'm a little jealous. I'm in the US, and my insurance would never pay for IP. I can go to therapy and psychiatry and doctors all I want, but not treatment.

[JEANNE]

That is great that your job is secure for 3 months (FMLA?! YES!) and you are paid 75% of salary, good. Seems that now BC/BS has to come through and then you are on your way! Honestly, if you are committed to the process and if you want it, then the sky is the limit. As with anything in life, you'll get out what you put into it. We all keep waiting for the boat to show up to our dock to save us, but if we aren't willing to step on board, it just isn't going to work! We have to be more than willing to get on board, at some point we have to take control of the oars too.

Best of luck, JS. Sounds as if the boat has arrived and the lifejacket is strapped on and you just need to step aboard, matey. Smooth sailing, friend. congratulaions and best of luck. be well xxoo Jeanne

[madeofstars]

Hi JS

Thats brilliant news! I know you said you are not 100% sure about it, but like others said, doing it for other people is not necessarily a bad thing, it shows that you are willing to try and change to make other people in your life happier and that's incredibly kind and lovely of you! And again, it's been said before, but I'll repeat, the harder you work and the more you put into it, the more you'll feel like you are doing it for yourself as well.

I wish you all the very very very best and hope it all works out for you. You dont deserve to be miserable and ruled by your ED, I'm so glad you have a chance to break free and live a happier life. Lots of love XX

[JSMarcus]

Oh gosh, I got the confirmation call today guys. Blue Cross Blue Shield gave me the green light. I have an eating disorder benefits package on my insurance plan for in-patient treatment. I got the green light to go.

I check-in at the hospital on the 17th at 9AM of this month. I got my paper work at work filled in and submitted. I just have to get a few other affairs here at home and at work for delegation of duties tied up and I ship off.

Thank you guys so much for helping me get there. You have challenged me, you have supported me, you have even humored me.

I don't know too many more details yet but I still want to hear from you all. Good, bad, beautiful, ugly but most of all HONEST. I might not respond right away but I'll be watching threads and email. I hope to hear from everyone. Lord knows I have to see something that proves there is something in the world that turns outside of a hospital right?

Good luck to us ALL!! Cheers!