LucyUK
03-26-2009, 10:42 AM
Hey everyone
I'm Lucy, 5ft11 i've been in recovery from anorexia for nearly 4 years now and suffer from Body dismophia but still needing support to get threw bad times so ive found this forum hoping to achieve just that.
April 2005 i collapsed at home weightin just 4st2 and admitted into hospital to cut a long story short i was in that hell hole for around 2 n half months being treated like i was some form of attention seeker by the nurses, i basicaly ate to gain weight so i could get out of there n be with my family, kind of a big mistake really.
Once i was discharged i had to attend weekly counciling with a eating disorder specialist, to be honest he just wasted his time, nothing that he ever said to me went in for some reason, rather than helping me come to terms with what myself n my family were dealing with like he was meant to he just blamed my mother as the source :S i had to fight it on my own yet again!
Now 4 years later im a healthyish weight of 8st5lbs but i still suffer with the voices calling myself fat. ugly worthless and that i dont deserve to have anything... its gettin to the point now were i can no long quell them everyday allday to the extent my head feels like its going to burst....
I suppose the first time i never really dealt with it properly and I should of tried harder with the couciling but i deeply regret that now.... i feel i cant talk to my family or friends about this due the amount of damage and hurt it caused last time but within the past month im falling back into my old habits of calorie counting n wanting to exercise alot more...
Simply just struggling...
Thank you for reading this far its nice to be somewere were others are having simliar problems
Lucy
I'm Lucy, 5ft11 i've been in recovery from anorexia for nearly 4 years now and suffer from Body dismophia but still needing support to get threw bad times so ive found this forum hoping to achieve just that.
April 2005 i collapsed at home weightin just 4st2 and admitted into hospital to cut a long story short i was in that hell hole for around 2 n half months being treated like i was some form of attention seeker by the nurses, i basicaly ate to gain weight so i could get out of there n be with my family, kind of a big mistake really.
Once i was discharged i had to attend weekly counciling with a eating disorder specialist, to be honest he just wasted his time, nothing that he ever said to me went in for some reason, rather than helping me come to terms with what myself n my family were dealing with like he was meant to he just blamed my mother as the source :S i had to fight it on my own yet again!
Now 4 years later im a healthyish weight of 8st5lbs but i still suffer with the voices calling myself fat. ugly worthless and that i dont deserve to have anything... its gettin to the point now were i can no long quell them everyday allday to the extent my head feels like its going to burst....
I suppose the first time i never really dealt with it properly and I should of tried harder with the couciling but i deeply regret that now.... i feel i cant talk to my family or friends about this due the amount of damage and hurt it caused last time but within the past month im falling back into my old habits of calorie counting n wanting to exercise alot more...
Simply just struggling...
Thank you for reading this far its nice to be somewere were others are having simliar problems
Lucy